It happened again. Every year, I have to put on my bifocals and take my ring off and look at the date engraved inside to remember if my anniversary is August 4th or August 5th. Numbers can be confusing.
After 43 years, you’d think I could remember that day of our wedding. Austin, Texas. Summer heat. Sunday afternoon. I’d fought for a small event, family only. My family was in Austin so I had a good representation. Dave’s was spread out, but we had 4 of his siblings come from Kansas and New Mexico, along with his parents. Families met one another that weekend. Glad they got along! (Well, for the most part…except for the early morning arrival by some who made the next door neighbors suspicious and the brother who picked my mother’s flowers to decorate our car.)
As task-oriented people, Dave and I can tend to be very pragmatic and deem celebrations unnecessary frivolity. We have learned though, that our wedding anniversary should be celebrated. If for no other reason, to celebrate that we have made it another year together.
We used to be celebrating that we had, in fact, literally, made it. Years of learning to respect and value each other’s strengths, years of disconnects and distractions that required patience and stamina, years of learning to communicate with truth and grace.
Now, in our 60’s, 43 years into this life together, we celebrate because we are happy.
In our ThirdThird, here are 7 ways were are happy together….
- We wake every morning to another day to enjoy the life we have created together. We agree to stay as healthy as possible and to need less so we can give more.
- We have found satisfying work that uses our strengths and gives us adequate funds in our 60’s. We help others, we arrange details for others, we explain things that others need to know. We get to use who we are wired to be.
- We agree on most things, so we don’t have to waste time arguing. When we disagree, we know it’s not the end of the world.
- We don’t have to explain ourselves to each other. We’ve experienced the same events, known many of the same people, stuck with each other through injustices and shared successes. We “get” each other. That’s a wonderful thing.
- We trust each other. Years of being trusty worthy has its benefits. No suspicions, no questioning, no smothering. Free to be together or to have experiences on our own.
- We eat the same food. This may seem like a small celebration, but it is handy in our ThirdThird that neither of us craves sugar or steak or Krispy Kremes or soda. Sharing the recreation of a tofu-broccoli Thai dish or being enthused over the discovery of making spring rolls or salmon with pesto and balsalmic carrots, is fun!
- We have the same goals. We desire to honor God with our lives, to travel with a purpose, to live simply and focus our resources and strength on ways to benefit a greater cause, and to value each person we meet.
It is a deep blessing to wake every morning and know that life is good, that all these years of life together have come to this good place, and that today, we have a lot to celebrate.