Focusing on what I’m good at is very freeing.
With limited energy and time, it makes sense to focus on my strengths instead of focusing on trying to be good at something I most likely won’t ever be.
Many years ago, when I took my very first personality assessment, it was one of the most freeing experiences I had ever had. Because of my family of origin, my husband’s choice of career, and my own lack of confidence, I felt like I had been in trouble for most of my life.
An opinionated, vocal, quick witted woman was not exactly cherished in my circles. Growing up, “Debbie did it” was a common assumption. As pastor’s wife, Dave was often met with the suggestion of “having more control of your family.” I knew that meant, “You should have married a quieter woman.”
I tried to be quiet for a while, but it didn’t last long and I wasn’t very good at it.
When I took an assessment of Behavior Styles, I saw that out of 16 possible Behavior Styles, I actually fit in one! It was a great relief! I wasn’t God’s first mistake!
My strengths were listed. I could make up my mind, could articulate an idea, could make something happen, could process options, and had a strength of character that others might value.
Being quiet and not having an opinion was not one of my strengths and trying to behave in that way was exhausting… not to mention that it was stifling the very ways I could contribute.
“One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.” -Tony Robbins
It was a great eye-opener for understanding how limiting it is to focus on what we are NOT good at, at the expense of neglecting what are our very valuable strengths.
I am no longer tempted to think I need to be good at everything.
It is possible to hire someone to create spreadsheets or to account for expenses and income. Finding someone who likes to research for a project or who loves to babysit is not impossible and builds a good team of people with different skills and interests.